1) “I have you to thank for everything and making such a big difference in my life. It is important to be happy.”
2) “Where do I start! Firstly, sorry I have taken my time to complete this! I didn’t forget, but somehow coming on here to fill this in ultimately means closure, which I wasn’t quite ready to do. During the time spent with you I feel that I have developed in to my own person. I had always gone from one disfunctional relationship to another and never stopped to work out who I wanted to be or to appreciate what I have. Now I enjoy my children, enjoy being on my own and am able to fill my time doing purposeful stuff, like theatre, galleries, walks in the park. I feel much more comfortable in asking for what I want and don’t try to please other as much, which means I am feeling more satisfied with the things that I do. My self esteem has grown and I now value myself far more than I ever have. I brought a mug the other day which says it all ‘life is not about finding yourself, its about creating yourself’ and through our sessions I believe we have created a base from which I can continue to grow and evolve. Thank you, I will be forever grateful.”
3) “I would recommend taking the time to take a clear look at where you are in life, how you got there, and what you would like to change to everyone. Every area of my life has improved by going through this process with Allan, and I have changed in ways I would never have expected at the beginning of the time together. In short, I never thought I would be able to describe myself as a happy person. It’s not an easy process, and it takes focus and commitment, but for me it has been more than worth it. My view of myself, my work and my relationships have all improved immeasurably as a result, and I hope they will stay that way because of what I’ve learned.”
4) “Counselling has helped me to find the person that I should be. It provided me with a way to be an active participant in my life rather than a viewer. It has given me the tools to cope with all the situations that life has to throw at you, whilst allowing you to keep calm and work through it all.”
5) “How was counselling helpful?: At the inception of my counselling with Allan I was at an extremely low ebb. Following an upsetting relationship break up my self esteem was at an all-time low, I was unable to clearly identify the causes of my set backs and my confidence had plummeted. Working together with Allan I was able to gain a clearer insight into my own behaviour and its origins. I have a newly restored sense of self belief, higher self esteem and an understanding of the behaviour of others and its impact upon me. I believe that I have the ‘tools’ and knowledge to prevent a reoccurrence of my previous problems, not just in the realms of personal relationships but in all relationships. I am very proud of the work that put in with Allan and I cannot recommend him highly enough.”
6) “When I first went to see Allan I was in a pretty rough way and had lost both perspective and confidence. Allan helped me by providing someone I could talk to – I found his sessions provided a regular checkpoint and an oasis in a time of stress and anxiety. As we built up our relationship, Allan helped me understand why I was feeling the way I was and provided me with a different perspective on my life, not being afraid to challenge some of my negativity. This helped me regain my confidence and gave me the mental tools to help me cope better in the future. I felt like we went on quite a journey over the course of our sessions and that I was provided with a new perspective with which to face the future.”
“I had very mixed feelings when I approached Allan as I had quite a negative view towards therapy and saw it as a sign of weakness, but with my marriage in a state of chaos I took the plunge and I’m so glad I did. It’s amazing how preconceived perceptions can turn out to be so different to reality. So after two years of therapy my marriage is saved and I’ve learned so much about myself and it’s all thanks to Allan.
As men we tend to grow up being told not to talk about our emotions but I found so much strength from letting go and talking about my fears and doubts especially to someone who is completely neutral and who does not judge. It’s not easy and you will definitely be challenged by Allan but that’s when growth happens. He has enabled me to identify areas in my personality that prevents me from making the most out of life, but he has also highlighted areas of strength so today I feel a much more rounded person.
All in all it was an interesting road with a lot of self-discovery. I would whole heartedly recommend Allan as a therapist.”
7) “Two years of talking therapy have changed my world. Our culture doesn’t really respect the process and we’re inclined to regard therapy as of marginal import. I shared that perspective. But my mind has been changed – literally. I have a propensity towards depression and grew up in an unhappy home where anger and violence created a nervous child who was forever left with a sense of impermanence. In adulthood I have constantly felt outgunned by those who went to the ‘right’ schools and universities. Latterly, I have felt marginalised and undermined by a community of high-achieving women who I believed regarded me as increasingly irrelevant. My therapist has taught me to celebrate the career as a serious artist which I achieved but which I was prone to talk down. An affair with a younger person which offered a complete contrast to my increasingly bruising marriage has been a central subject in therapy for the last year. From that I have learned to treasure the good the experience brought, to transcend the intense emotional upheaval it provoked, and have been able to achieve a better union with my wife than we shared for many years. I entered therapy considering myself an ill tutored bore who didn’t deserve to be taken seriously, and who was waiting to be found out. I also suffered (and I think to some degree will continue to suffer) from societal changes that have marginalised male concerns, particularly as we grow old and come to question the viability of the ‘us’ shaped hole in existence. I have learned not to lie, to trust myself, to think of myself as a potent sexual creature again, and have gained the ability to hold off from knee jerk reactions and allow internal processes to work on a subject and ultimately decide whether or not that ‘issue’ really matters. I have now stepped away from therapy, but in truth I think of it as a pause not a full stop. Therapy is dynamic. It changes its nature as it changes you, and there is always, always, something worth talking about. And, while I feel I’m going to be okay, I won’t feel guilty or disappointed if I restart at some point. I might again need therapy to help me keep being a person I actually like.”